Flatulence

Whenever Shadow sits on my lap, she farts. And let me tell you, it is criminally, OFFENSIVELY odiferous.

Big news today: Wind. I can’t tell you how much I hate Wind. I have always hated Wind, from the tenderest of years. I remember walking to elementary school saying ‘aaaaaaargh!’ to the Wind because I was so mad at it for blowing at me, against me, all around me and making a bother by doing so.  I don’t mean breezes, mind you. Breezes are one thing. They are nice and they are mannerly. It is Wind that I do not like. Today, Wind blew all the cardboard I had laid down nice and, well, no, not neatly (I’m sure the neighbors are VERY glad I did it) on my grass to kill it and thereby skip the step of taking off sod next year when I expand my garden willy-nilly (how the cardboard was blown, in case you missed the flow. yes, I just finished proofreading something) all over everywhere so I had to run outside twice–twice!!– to put it back in place/put the weights back on it. (I guess I really should have ordered that mulch to put over it, it being the cardboard in question here.)

Anyway.

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