In Which Mrs Fussy Crankypants Needs a Drink or Five

Mrs Fussy Crankypants is very often fairly sure of the failure of her parenting skills or lack thereof (particularly after Mrs FC has had wonderful help with the TT times with her family).  Mrs FC is often fairly sure that the TT will somehow grow up to be a Ruined Individual and that she herself will not survive The Continuing Now for 19 Months Fussy.

Often Mrs FC feels like she is going to Lose It.  Mrs FC may, in these instances, sit abjectly and without any motivation for anything whatsoever in the kitchen with a half-naked TT on her lap (the lower half. since diaper changes are An Issue) and, as the TT blissfully dumps yogurt onto the table and creates a variety of designs, whorls and oh-so-sticky swirls, Mrs FC will allow the tears to trickle in all their unloveliness down her not-inconsiderable nose.  Mrs FC may yell and rant at The Universe. She could possibly yell and rant at the cats.  She quite frequently refrains from hastening the cats on their way, wherever that may be at the time, with her foot.  She even sometimes wonders what possessed her when she thought that parenthood would be ‘nice’ and a ‘good opportunity for growth’.

Mrs FC has even considered moving back to Indiana to be near La Grande Dame a la Fussy aka the TT’s Nana (before moving at last to the most delightful of all nirvanas Portland, OR) (always with the proviso that any job opportunities that present themselves in foreign countries, particularly that involve beaches and maitais, automatically trump any other living opportunity (foreign countries, CALL US. Mr FC is a Whiz Accountant)) which only goes to show just how Het Up Mrs FC can at times get.

After a good cry or eight, with cookie dough mixed up and in the fridge waiting to be eaten and a bottle glass of wine waiting to be drunk, the evening sun glowing and, most importantly, the TT being cared for by Dada, Mrs FC feels much less morose and looks forward to a night’s sound intermittant rest with upcoming garden plans for the weekend.

And, despite the fact that La Grande Dame a la Fussy assures Mrs FC that many a voice was raised when Mrs FC was a toddler, Mrs FC remembers none of it. Mrs FC is sure that she, Mrs FC, is pretty much The Worst Mom on the Planet but she is also sure that she will soon get to nurse the TT (for the 8 millionth time today) to his peaceful sound slumber and that she will feel, as she always does at the end of the day and with his sweet little body resting so trustingly in her arms, that she is ready for that wine might possibly love the TT more than anything else in the Known Universe. 

 

 

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(Usually)

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7 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Cari
    May 07, 2009 @ 19:51:10

    Just caught up on your very fun, honest blog (what else is a post-surgery-bored-to-death patient to do than surf the internet until it’s time to take another pain med and sleep for hours on end?). I’m not sure if I shared this with you before or not, but recently I saw an Oprah show on motherhood. One mother said something like, “I love my kids more than anything in the world…I tolerate motherhood.” I think only mothers of toddlers and teens can truly appreciate that sentiment, wouldn’t you agree? My kids often bring me to tears…both the sad and happy kind, so I get you!

    Reply

    • ~m
      May 07, 2009 @ 20:10:27

      Cari, thanks for sharing. I like that quote. I think you are right that a lot of moms feel that way. Or, maybe it’s just you, me and the woman on Oprah 🙂
      I hope you are getting better. I’ve been thinking about you even tho I haven’t dropped a line. Gall bladder! Yuck! Get well soon!

      Reply

  2. The Mom
    May 08, 2009 @ 07:37:49

    I love that quote! I think that’s how MOST mothers feel, but are somehow too ashamed to admit it because they assume everyone else is just loving it.

    Reply

  3. Emily
    May 09, 2009 @ 13:31:21

    Aw M! I know little M adores you immensely. I think we’ve all had those times where we just want to walk out the door and not come back for a few hours…or days..or sometimes weeks?

    I hope that if you’re gardening this weekend that it relaxes you and that daddy and little M can have some quality time together so as to give mama a break for her day tomorrow!

    Reply

  4. Olivia
    May 10, 2009 @ 18:09:08

    M, you really ought to hang out with me and my momz sometime…we’re always talking about how we feel like we’re terrible parents. At least join the yahoo group… there’s safety (and love and support) in numbers!

    Just do the best you can – that’s all you can do. And separate out the pressure you put on yourself from the pressure that others put on you. You can always choose not to listen to others (and that includes Dr Sears 🙂

    Reply

  5. Sharon
    May 11, 2009 @ 18:18:37

    When I was with you last year in April, I thanked God that He had chosen the very best person possible to be M’s mommy. Even if you don’t see it (and all you see are the times you are impatient), you are a wonderful mother. Don’t forget whom we wanted (want) to take care of the daughter if something should happen to us. Out of all the people in the universe, it is you whom I would trust with my daughter’s life and future.

    Reply

  6. Lisa
    May 30, 2009 @ 07:24:56

    doing a lot of blog catching up today–have to echo some of the above
    1) the quote is awesome
    2) joining a group might be good for you, either on-line or in person. it’s good to have a reminder that you are not alone
    3) Dr. Sears said himself that he pulled most of his advice nearly out of thin air. Ignore him.
    4) the fact that you are still sane continues to amaze me. you are so strong, and I am impressed.
    5) I wish I was nearer. I remember watching a neighbors colicky baby for 20 minutes several days a week so she could go for a walk. Would love to do something similar for you.

    Reply

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