There’s One Born Every Minute; or, the Fussy Crankypants Do Their Best to Not be Too Wealthy

Let’s just review the Fussy house status so far, shall we?

The Fussys put down $15,000 for their mortgage as good little homeowners should do because The Fussys knew that one should ALWAYS make a downpayment or else you are just being Foolish.

In order to get OUT of their house The Fussys have so far spent:

$100, paint
$80, electric paint roller (SO worth it, by the way; absolutely couldn’t have done without it)
$100, various and sundry improvement items such as new front porch light, etc.
$250, carpet cleaning
$250, carpet stretching and repair (thanks, kitties)
$250, plumbing of 110v electrical line for gas stove (there was only 220v. The Fussys have been using an air conditioner extension cord all these past 4 years to power their stove)
$250, fix toilet leak
$766.80, kill termitez dead
$290, have a structual engineer come tell the Fussys that the support beam they installed when they moved in was fine, among other things he told the Fussys, including but not limited to how he wants to take his 3 year old grandson squirrel hunting, how the current administration is making the country go to hell in a handbasket [in 9 months, mind], how the polar bears aren’t really going extinct and how everyone in the whole country is angrier than he’s ever seen before [except, probably, when Clinton was elected])
$3441.60, new sewer stack to replace the 100-year old pipes that were in the “worst condition the plumber had seen in 15 years” and which were leaking fecal matter into the house (oh. hope you aren’t eating dinner right now. sorry about that)

so where are we at?


Then the Fussys will be paying:

$3000, closing costs
$405, home warranty
$5514, realtor fees

coming to:


leaving the Fussys with

$445 out of the initial $15,000 they invested into homeownership.

But at least they will be able to pay off the mortgage.  So that’s something anyway.

Mrs Fussy Crankypants will now go scavenge some cardboard boxes to give to her son as Christmas presents. She is sure that he will probably like those just as well as gifts that cost money because what 2 year old doesn’t love a good box?


1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Emily
    Oct 15, 2009 @ 14:12:06

    we have a giant cardboard box sitting in our dining room right now that has provided HOURS of fun. I’m thinking about hunting for more on Freecycle and making an indoor village out of them. Seriously…it’s worth a shot to locate some inexpensive boxes..I bet he’d love them just the same as “material” gifts. 🙂


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