Innie, Pt II: The Parent Trap

The only thing about being an innie, right? Is that no one tells you how being a parent is going to be SO HARD.  Devastatingly hard, at times. Cah-RAZY hard. Need-a-drink-right-this-minute-give-me-the-whole-damn-bottle hard.

Cause on the one hand, see, you got this powerful need to decompress, right?  to let your brain not have to deal with any more sensory input, right? to be quiet and think and listen to maybe even nothing, just the crickets and a random car going by.

And on the other hand, see, you got these two boy children. And boy children?  They don’t stop.

Ever.

The Energizer Bunny?  He’s got nothing on them.  They NEED to go. They NEED to yell and scatter toys and wreak havoc and mayhem and stick tape on the cat.  They NEED to tell you what is going on in their brain every second because it’s so important and interesting to them (which is fine, by the way)

And it’s all fine.  I understand that they need that.  But. I need the other stuff, too. the quiet and calm.

So it’s two conflicting needs fighting.

And I’m not saying extroverts have it easy.  I can stay home for days on end with the kids (as long as we can get outside) and its fine.  It’s hard to go out with kids; its got to be super-hard for extroverts to fill their tanks with adult social interaction just as it’s hard for me to carve out some peace to process.

There’s more and more books and articles about parenting introverted kids (OMG!  Little Debbie doesn’t want to come out of her room! She just wants to read ALL DAY LONG!  What’s WRONG with her?? Does she need therapy??? Medication????)  (um, puh-lease. she just needs to you let her read and be there with a hug and a cookie when she comes up for air. she’s fine. it’s cool. just chill.), which is very good. The last thing a kid needs is to feel like there’s something wrong with him because he doesn’t want to be simultaneously part of 3 sports teams, the debate club and orchestra.

But there’s not a whole lot out there about how to stay sane as an introvert parent.  Blogs? Yes. Books? Not so many.

Maybe I’ll write one someday.

If I survive.

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. aviets
    Aug 15, 2013 @ 22:04:04

    Wow, good point. Being very introverted myself, I wish I had thought of that as an explanation for my intense need for quiet, alone time when the kids were little and so insanely full of energy and noise. It makes so much sense! -Amy

    Reply

  2. ~m
    Aug 16, 2013 @ 07:25:38

    Right, Amy. You end up feeling so guilty about it, don’t you? but if you don’t get it, your patience suffers and your parenting suffers. And sometimes you don’t get it when you need it during the day. But somehow you manage. I mean, I guess. You stumble through, anyway!!

    Reply

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